I’m 24 and have never been in a relationship. Shocking, right? I don’t think so. My fellow twenty-somethings sympathize. My married twenty-somethings pat me on the back and tell me she’s out there – somewhere. My never-been-single-in-their-life friends just don’t get it. And well – they probably never will.
It doesn’t bother me. Well, most of the time at least. In some ways I’m proud to have made it 24 years without being defined by a relationship. It’s helped me figure out who I am – independent of a significant other. But I’m not gonna sit here and lie, of course there are times when I find myself thinking, I wish I had someone to share life with. As an adult TCK especially, there are no constants in my life, nor have there ever been. The only constant is – well, me.
The truth of it is I know. I know with all my heart, that she really is out there somewhere. Maybe I know her already, maybe I don’t.
For me, I feel like from as early as I can remember God has put marriage and parenthood on my heart. I know it’s not something every guy says, but yeah, I think about marriage, I think about being a father.
I think about what type of husband I want to be. I think about what type of father I want to be. I think about how I would propose. I think about the type of values I want my children to have. I take mental notes of good parenting. And I know that one day, well, I will be both a husband and a father. And I look forward to that day.
I just pray I don’t make the mistake of living so far ahead in the future that I become disconnected from the present.
You see, I don’t think God’s holding back from me at all. I think He’s using my prolonged singleness to make me into the man that will one day be that husband and father I yearn to be.
Let me also clarify, I don’t think my story is everyone’s story. I’m not against dating as a teenager and as an adult. It’s just turned out in my case that well, it hasn’t happened that way. And you know what? I really am ok with that.
Because she really is worth the wait.
To be continued…(one day).